that that last comment will cause major dissonance.

Did you know, that by acting dumb, you can learn a lot from someone?
I didn't until I tried it.
HOLY SHIT!
I thought I had issues.
But, no, I didn't.
Not compared to those two-faced types.

I think the word for it is hypocrisy.
Arguing for one thing that is undermined by your talking points.
No wonder politicians are fucked!
They have to pander to this shite in order to get into power.
NO WONDER it's so easy to sway them!

Is this your own secret place?

It's my hidey hole.
:)

Well, fear not lest you fear too much.
And fear not that others will invade your hidey hole.
(Other than me, that is.)

I forgot how safe and warm it is in here.
I thought I'd go back to my roots.
You are always welcome.

Thank you.
You were up late last night.
When you were posting here, I was asleep.

I got myself on a very strange schedule.
I sleep about 5 hours the first time, do things, then take a 2 hour nap.
That means I'm usually up until about 3am now.
I don't like it, I don't know how it happened, but I'm having a hard time changing it back.

It's good you were sleeping last night.
You got to miss the dueling psychos.
I shamefully admit that I enjoyed the show.
Okay, maybe not so shameful.

It's something to look at in the middle of the night.

I dream about this place too much as it is.
That's why, if I wake up in the night, I do NOT turn on my puter.
No way, Jose.
I just wait until I fall asleep again.

Even when there's nothing but crap being posted, I stop in here all day long.
I don't even know why.

Every time I finish a chore, I stop in to this place.
I definitely think I'm an addict, because sometimes I'll just click refresh a few times when it's dead before I head off to something else.
Sometimes, I read and respond to things that make me wonder wtf I'm doing with my time, but I keep coming back.
The funny thing is that when I'm busy, I don't think about it.
If I'm home, it's just automatic.

I'm an addict.

Me, too.
What's to be done with us?
I have a headache and family problems that beat anything that's happening here and yet I keep coming back.

I don't know what to do.
Have you tried weaning yourself?
I have.
It kinda works for a while, but the minute I lose mindfulness, here I am again.
THIS is why I pray for the end of the world.
I have issues.

I go elsewhere, but I always come back here.
I'm addicted to the energy, the vibe, the tiny bits of chaos.


I fear I will never be the same as I was yesterday, but tomorrow holds such promise of a new way.
Little bit of old, little bit of new and viola! Something different.

I can't afford to wean myself.
This is my social life, such as it is.

My boat as well.
But, but . . . you're so awesome.
Your conversational skills are so amazing to me.
You could easily have a gaggle of folks surrounding you and hanging on your every word.
A bit of a dramatic exaggeration, but not untrue in the least.

Yes, but that's only pleasurable if you like the hangers-on.
I'd prefer a gaggle of like-minded folks who could engage me in stimulating conversations about things of real interest.
Something like that isn't easy to find.
I thought the internet would be like that, but it isn't.
So I read here, at least everyone is somewhat familiar.

I understand.
I am not entirely unfamiliar with your dilemma.

I know but it does me good to vent.
Take a look at the Andromeda.
This was shot in a man's back yard, with special equipment that he made by himself.

Holy!
I am always amazed at the things humankind can do.

I hope you didn't feel I was trying to stifle your venting.
I always try to come up with solutions instead of just listening.
I'm like a man in that regard.
I think it's because I find it so much easier to think rather than do.

Yeah, me too. It's hard not to come up with solutions.

BTW, I was agreeing with you when you said that even though you smoke, you are less likely to get the lung cancer than people who use tons of "products" on a daily basis.
I know of quite a few non-smokers who have died of lung cancer and nobody can figure out why.
DUH!

I thought you were going for a walk.

I would trust you to send me something but I can't use that kitty litter thingy in my tiny place.
I have to keep the litter box in the bathroom, which is small, thats why we use a rectangular pan.
The best I could do for her would be to make a ramp but she doesn't seem to mind climbing in.
Her birthday is on Dec. 3 and she's going to be 8 years old.
I keep wondering if she's going to fall in love, get married and move away but she never goes outside so I don't think she's going to meet her handsome prince.
And she refuses to get a job to help out with the household expenses.
I'm at my wit's end with that girl.

What a deadbeat cat.

She takes a lot for granted, thats for sure.

I bet she appreciates you more than she lets on, poor thing.
Some people have a hard time with the mushy emotions.

Yep, she's not a mushy cat, that's for sure.

Yes.

Well, I'm not too familiar with this season's new socks yet.

being in the mix of RL society isn't the be all and end all. For decades, I was involved with people in RL in some form or another, thru work, and other activities, with there rarely being a day of the week (including weekends) when I didn't have to leave the house to go somewhere or fulfill some societal role.

Everytime I was scurring around the house getting ready to go off to some other event, etc., I'd look at my cat lounging on my bed, watching me run around Mach I with mah hair on fire, and would think "how come she gets to enjoy life at a slower pace than I am?" How come, between the two of us, I'm the busier one, but still have to feed and water her, plus clean up her crap!"

it was a moment of crystallization.

Between her nap schedules, my cat was really enjoying her life....but I couldn't say the same thing about mine!


so now I do whatever I want...just like my cat.


I figured since God created cats to be that way, he wouldn't mind if I impersonated one.

I agree and that's why my life is more laid back now.
You wouldn't have believed my whirlwind of social activity ten years ago.
I didn't have my zen cat back then.

makes you cherish the 'down time' even more now...

I've warned my daughter and my driven older sister about not going Mach One with hair on fire through life, because all those events are like emotional energy ripples in the ocean of life, that seem to flow in succession along the surface.... until at some point they'll eventually plow into a seawall or rocks.


something like what happened to Lorretta Lynn, on stage. In one crystalizing moment, all the waves of her life caught up with each other and plowed into her mental wall....the one we all build that holds back overload.

YES!
Oh, I do love you people in the secret room.
Isn't it funny how the little details of life can muck you up?
Once you suss out the problem, it's so obvious that you just about lose your eyes up into your brain rolling them at yourself.

It's true.

When I see people running around at Mach 1 with their heads on fire, I say a little hope for peace to them and remember how busy I used to try to keep myself so I didn't have to think.
You know? That's actually my favorite thing to do now when I'm feeling a depression cloud coming on. I busy myself with helping others.
Do you know I feel guilty after I feel normal again?
I do.
I feel like I've used these people and then someone will say they missed me when the guilt subsides and I return. . .
Then I don't feel so bad.
If I am using these people for my own selfishness, it is doing something for them.
THAT realization made me feel guilty for feeling guilty.
I have such issues!

You're not using them, you're redirecting your energy to benefit someone else.


Think of it more as a built-in circular blessing.... rather than a hamster wheel guilt trip.

I try, I do.
My rationale and my emotion don't always see eye to eye.

Loki,

I've done volunteer work to help myself feel better.

It helps me.